Tao de Haas posted on November 01, 2011 19:39
You might think this is a strange question and the answer will probably surprise you! Your initial reaction is most likely to be something like: 'Me, a God complex?! You’ve got to be kidding! I often think I am not good enough, smart enough and that I should try harder to improve myself. I often do silly things and make mistakes, so how could I possibly have a God complex? I know some people that might have a God complex, but me, no way! If anything the opposite is true!'
That’s the point!
Yes, you see that is exactly the point! If you think or say what you have just read above, even if it's only occasionally, you have just confirmed that you are suffering from a God complex! I will explain. How often do you berate and harshly judge yourself, and in turn feel bad and inadequate? Do you say such things to yourself as: 'How could I have been so stupid, I feel like such an idiot? I feel so bad, so guilty!' Or often, I hear such comments as: 'I am working on myself, but I am not quite there yet'.
Failed before you even started!
It is understandable that many people think this way. After all, many of us have been conditioned to think we are bad, that we have ‘faults’ and that we are just not good enough. Many of us were raised according to certain religious beliefs such as, you are born a sinner and that you need to spend a lifetime repenting and bettering yourself. You have failed before you even started! If, by chance, these beliefs work for you and help you, make you feel good and encourage you to flourish and evolve in a positive way, then hang onto them! But if these beliefs are not helping or working for you, then take a moment to think about the following.
Guilty as charged, are we ‘there’ yet?
Who do you expect to be when you are ‘there’? (whatever ‘there’ means). And when you feel guilty, what are you guilty of? In essence what you are saying is that you should know everything that is going to happen in advance, so that you can explore all options and take the right course of action and never make a mistake. Or you say that you are not good enough until you become a better person. In other words you are not perfect, until you are perfect (‘there’)!!
Yes it’s true!
Sure we are all careless, thoughtless, inconsiderate, greedy and selfish at times. And no we don’t always employ the most ethical, effective and considered behaviour, and yes we all stuff up sometimes, (me today you tomorrow).
Yes, it’s true you are human. Being human means exactly that, a being that is not a robot but a very complex sentient being. You are so complex that you will never really fully get to know yourself. But one thing is certain; beating up on yourself is one sure and certain way to understand yourself even less!
It is essential
I am not saying don’t critique yourself, don’t question, and don’t reflect on the past and what you can do differently in the future. I am not telling you not to care or do whatever you like regardless of other people and their feelings. On the contrary, I think it is essential to be aware, be conscious, reflect and deliberate if your behavior could serve you better!
But, in order to do this, it is important that you accept the complexity of being human. If you think that you should be perfect and know the exact consequences of your actions in advance or that you can’t make mistakes and you should know better (and so on) that is where the problem lies. You are then making the mistake of thinking that somehow you are not human and that you should be Godlike and superior, unlike the rest of us humans. If you think this way, then indeed you are suffering from a God complex!
An imperfect concept
If we look and reflect upon ourselves with humility, rather than from some misplaced superiority, only then can we truly accept our humanness. Only from this position can we make the changes we want or need to make, take responsibility for the things we are responsible for and care for the things we need to care for. In accepting our own humanness we can also accept the humanness in others. As I often say; the human concept of perfection is the most imperfect concept.